Off-trail Aspen Grove

Chokecherries ripen after rain, feel like they’ve been crying, like me, crying for all the suffering in the world. And with the return of the sun, I walk to an off-trail Aspen grove, a favorite wild where I go to be among wilderness friends. I find them and lots…wild geranium, blazing star, golden aster, bee balm, blanket flower, mariposa lily, wild daisy, black-eyed susan, harebells and of course butterflies and bumblebees.  As I take a seat in the grove, I feel what feels like a sensation of healing from my head, which feels tight and a bit dizzy, to my stomach which feels sick, to my hip which I’m told needs replacing, and all the way to my big toe which has an ingrown nail. This little aspen grove is a good place to be and just be. It’s the kind of place where I feel so in touch with being alive that it almost makes me cry, but a cry of joy. That feeling in this wilderness wonder reminds me to remind my brain that I’m okay, that I’m safe. The medicine here is in the silence and solitude and that nothing here is human made, but me. Yet, I feel the health in thinking of myself too, as a wonder. I see and absorb the deep beauty of this place. I turn inward and see the deep beauty in me. It’s self-awareness not about feeling better than anyone else or anything. It’s a healthiness I need to be a helper in a suffering world, when I return. For now, I continue sitting in the wild.